Clock ticking, unforgiving. What
will come with the striking bell?
My heart-beats come faster, wishing
time would come slower
Closer and closer I’m coming to the
unknown hour
What is this illuminating light, in my ruminating mind—
Is it from the sun that warmed my childhood walks?
Is it of the Son, that humble holy one?
Sun or Son, Lux aeterna, will my dwindling candle’s flame
become you?
Waiting for my final hour, hopeful,
and helpless.
The chatter of old friends, the hard
and softness of furniture
Will anything be familiar where I’m
going?
My heart beats, the clock ticks
toward the dawn of eternity’s light
Angels, I can see you! Will you lift this heavy body?
Share your feathered wings with me,
Lift me flying to a perpetual place
Of growing life, where strong hearts beat
My heart-beats hasten. I fear.
Evil spirits! Dead spirits!
Wailing in my frightened ears, devouring
my flesh.
Night grows darker, my mind is dim.
Yet – I see a table, set with delights,
And people whose hearts have struggled and laughed with mine
My beloved ones gather to sing and feast, faces lit with
life.
Is it Heaven I’m seeing, or only Earth?
Heaven! In heaven are there pastures? I see verdant
pastures,
They are irrigated with waters from rivers of life, flowing
from tears of love.
Lavender and jades, grains and bushes, forests!
And beyond them, flocks of creatures, strange and kind
I wait, I wait for my end to come,
an answer to my questions:
I cannot resist the pulse of time,
the final beat and bell
My heart hopes, heavy and hoping.
I’m ready for the rest
-January 2014
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